Lately, every time I start to write, I dont want to. I still love writing, but I try to live by the saying, If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say nothing at all. I don’t have much good to say right now. Nothing really bad either. I’m just blah. I don’t know what it is about Spring, but I realize every year that is when my life takes a turn. A turn that sets the tone for the rest of my year and it usually isn’t a good tone. A tone that leaves me grasping for placement while hanging off a cliff with no one else around to save me but myself. Do you know what I mean?
So here I am trying to figure out how to change the tone. How not to go down the rabbit hole. How to reclaim my hopeful, happy mindset. That has been my focus for the last month or so. This year has to be different. This year will be different! I got shit to accomplish. This state of doing and being is not conducive to the life I say I want to live. The life that I am meant to live.
I always find when I talk about my struggles, there are others who feel the same way. Living a life that feels wrong and yearning for the life of our dreams. How do we find the path that will lead us to the life we are meant to live? I am trying to find it for us. When I do, I will make sure I share it. And if you find it first, I need you to share it with me.
At times, I feel so ungrateful because I have a good life. I do not have a need, or many wants, that are unfulfilled. Yet, something just ain’t right. How many of you can relate? I don’t know if my perspective is skewed or if I am in a state of cognitive dissonance. I just know I don’t like it. Under all this, is the me I know. The me I want to be. The me that writes. The me that has something to say, … well a lot of things actually. Be well and whole. Much Love 💙 🧩