Author: elsims

I had started to create a totally different post to talk about my 40th birthday but it made me sad. I have decided to acknowledge the great parts of my birthday weekend instead. I had two of my closet friends come to celebrate with me. Patty from Virginia and Delanea from Texas. We went to a nice restaurant called Live Edge. They had a live band, which I can’t remember the name of, who gave an awesome performance.

We left there and meet up with my family at Club Opium.

My cousin Kermit and his band gave a great live performance and had everyone dancing. The band’s name is Quinn & Jukebox. Check them out next time you are in Atlanta.

The next day was a little different. Pretty much rained the whole day. I had wanted to climb Stone Mountain but I guess not. We did finally get ourselves to moving and rode around the city. My cousins Kehana and Lamia live in Atlanta so they were our tour guides. That evening we went to Suite Lounge.

Still toasting to my 40 years on this planet.

Nice bar and restaurant. Rode around some more and took a few great night pictures.

Also, we saw a really disturbing sight. A homeless young man laying in the street. Initially, my cousin thought he had been hit but he was actually laying by the vent. He had no blankets or coverings of any kind. He was getting heat from the vent. Kehana had a blanket and a sheet in her trunk. We drove back around and she gave him those items. Very heartbreaking.

Sunday, it was like I was in Toledo. The temperature was in the forties. Very cold and windy. I was able to meet up with Patty for breakfast before her flight was due. It was a nice little cafe with a french theme.

Sadly, Delanea’s flight left out early so I didn’t get to see her before she left. One valuable lesson I did learn from this. I will not plan a trip with friends and family again. It is either one or the other. My family was definitely trying to hog me. I didn’t get to spend nearly as much time with my friends. And I was so looking forward to really hanging with them. After breakfast, we just stayed in the room and watched movies.

Let’s just say that my weekend did not turn out as expected. And 40 is not exactly off to a good start. I am trying to not have a bad attitude about it. But I think I’m still holding a grudge. Lol. Well a year is a long time to hold a grudge. I’ll be over it before 41.

For all who shared this milestone birthday with me before and after the day, I thank you. I am grateful and appreciative for each and every one of you. My circle is so small but it is filled with love, understanding and acceptance. What more could a girl ask for? I would have liked for a different outcome but we sometimes have to make the most of what we get. I had purchased this shirt from Target because I felt that this was my time and I am not giving up on this tag line. These next years I am going to make them my best years. Let The Adventure Begin!

October 25th, 2017 marks the 20th anniversary of the Million Woman March which was held in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. I was a part of that day in history. I was 19 years old about to be 20 years old. My memories from that day are vague because I have a horrible memory of older events in my life. I attended with my mom and some family friends. I feel like we wore matching shirts that day. If so I no longer have it nor would I probably be able to fit it. Lol. I remember after the event walking to the mall all by myself and buying a few clothing items and a famous Philly cheese steak, not a fan. I know I’m going to get some flack for that statement. Not enough vegetables and too much meat for me. The next day walking around and seeing some of the historic sites of Philadelphia. The end.

Did the Million Woman March make an impact? At the time maybe, lasting not at all. How many times have you or someone you know ever talked about it? Were you even aware that there was such an event? I have a nightgown that reminds me of the March every time I wear it. Yes I have a 20 year old nightgown. But if I had not attend the March would I remember that it happened. Probably vaguely. Like I said I have a horrible memory for older events. I am sure that the founders may still have things going on that are tied to the original event. There is nothing on a mainstream level that I have heard of. Hell what was the purpose of the march? The Million Woman March was similar to the Million Man March. It was a March organized by African American women to bring awareness to social conditions, injustices and inequality experienced by African American woman. We were coming together as women to support each other and encourage each other.

Recently I walked in another March, the Women’s March. I attended a local March in Ann Arbor, Michigan with my dear friend Sherry. Her friend made us pussycat hats and I took my walking sticks. We chanted and cheered with other women and a fair amount of men who love their women. When I made it home to look at all the news stories from around the world in support of the Women’s March, I teared up. It touched my heart. I was humbled by the amount of people that showed up to protest the treatment of women in 2017. And here I was a part of a similar March in 1997. Why are we still revisiting the same issues? As a married woman you cannot get your tubes tied without permission from your husband. As a married man, he can get a vascetomy and you would be none the wiser. Huh? Women in similar or equal positions to men in the workforce are still being paid less. Oh we dont have families to feed too? Women are sexually assaulted on a regular basis, even big name celebrities, and it is ignored or looked at as normal. What? The loser currently holding office as President is shown on tape talking about how he sexually assaults women and people vote him into office because God forbid you vote for a woman. The worst part is that women who should be looking out for other women support him. Girl, you just another nasty bleeding pussy to him. I can’t make sense out of that.

After 20 years, nothing has changed. Black women are not united, we do not march through our day to day lives encouraging and uplifting each other and we do not stand in support of each other. I know this statement has ruffled some feathers and that’s fine because the truth hurts. When I say this I’m not talking about your friends. Of course we do that for our friends. I’m talking about random women. Women you meet at your job, women you see walking down the street, women you see at social events. How often do you compliment a woman of color? When you see a woman succeeding in life at her own business or whatever she chooses to be, do you go over and encourage her? Or when you see a woman down and out, do you uplift her? I did not used to do these things when I was younger. Now I am quick to offer a compliment, high five someone about their successes and give any woman an encouraging word and send prayers up on her behalf. I don’t care who you are. Race is not a factor for me. We are all women and that is the bonding factor. I realize that all women in this society are not seen as equal. But that shouldn’t stop us from supporting each other. How will we ever get to where we want to go by letting our color divide us? We won’t.

I am not a feminist. I’m just a woman, a black woman, that is seen as less than in a society that is ruled by men. Stupid ass men. As a woman, I want my rights to be equal to theirs. And if my participation at 19 years old in a march and 39 years old in a different march brings some amount of awareness to our strength and our fight, I’m all for it. What I would really like to see is women truly coming together in our day to day lives standing up for each other, loving on each other and praying for each other. Women have so much more power than we are aware of. It’s time we start using it to help each other and therefore help the world.

For those who may not be aware, there is a Women’s Convention being held by the Women’s March organizers happening in Detroit, Michigan on October 27th – 29th. There will be about 42 speakers in attendance including featured speaker Rep. Maxine Waters. Side note, Maxine Waters was one of the speakers in the Million Woman March in 1997. The title is “Reclaiming Our Time”. If you have attended either of the two previous events I mentioned, tell me about your experiences. Did it change you in any way? If you plan on attending the upcoming event, why? What is your motivation? What would you, as a woman or man, like to see differently in this world where women are concerned? What are you willing to do to effect change? Please share your comments on this post. Or as always, you can email me at elsims27@yahoo.com.

P.S.
Sorry I’m late. I fell asleep.

I recently took a trip to Cancun, Mexico with 3 of my best friends. The trip had its ups and downs but overall I had a great time. We went parasailing,

We also rode on the Subsea Explorer and I saw a mermaid.

Yes they do exist! Lol. I even rode on a jet ski.

It took us out to the boat to parasail. Fun, fun, fun.

I don’t travel much and have not been outside the USA since it was mandatory to have a passport. Usually I drive to my destination because I don’t like to limit what I can bring. And if I purchase something, I don’t want to worry about having enough room in my suitcase to bring it back. Or the issue with the weight of your suitcase. Plus oddly enough, I actually like driving. I am celebrating my birthday in Atlanta, Georgia this year and I could have caught a flight, but I’m driving. I can listen to all my jams, think about life and do some serious praying. And not praying that the plane doesn’t crash. Lol.

I have already highlighted some of the ups of my trip. I would like to bring attention to the downs of my trip right now. Nothing serious but some things that I learned and mistakes I won’t make again. First, we will go back to the luggage issue. Now I had never been to Mexico so I wasn’t sure of what to pack and I definitely overpacked. We did not have any set plans for the trip so I felt like I needed to be prepared for all possibilities. That was my thinking when I packed my suitcase. Still no excuse for the amount of clothes I put in there. Lol. I need to start learning how to pack for flights because I plan on taking more trips outside the US. What I should have packed was swimsuits, a few sundress and some shoes. That’s all I used besides sun hats, which my friends grew to hate because I didn’t take them off. I have a bad reaction to the sun and I was not about to look ugly on this trip or when I got back home. I get extreme heat rash. One thing that was an up, I got mild heat rash only on my arms and shoulders. Also, I did prepare by going to my doctor before the trip. She provided me with a Medrol dose pack if I did have a bad reaction and some cream to clear up the rash. That was the first time I did that. I usually wing it and suffer the consequences until I get home, then get a steroid shot to clear it up. Smart Ebony. Lol

Second, I did not exchange my US money for Mexican pesos. Big mistake. Now I personally didn’t buy anything and that was the reason why. I found that the different places we went processed the exchange rate at whatever the hell rate they wanted to. I’m pretty sure that I was going to get ripped off because I know that my friends did. I think Monica paid $9 for an ice cream cone. And honestly, I don’t need anything else crowding up my house. The one thing that I didn’t purchase that I wanted was a magnet. Any country whose currency value is less than the American dollar, needs to be exchanged. They had a place in the airport where you can exchange money once you get to Mexico. Then on your way out there is another location where you can change it back. I truly recommend this, especially if you plan on purchasing items and eating at other locations than your hotel. Our trip was all inclusive. The only money I used was to tip.

Third downer, keep all the papers that are given to you in the process of going through customs. We were not told this. They just rushed us through. Since there was a language barrier, not a lot of talking. I always keep any papers or receipts from travel until I get home. My lovely friend Monica threw a paper away or misplaced a paper that was essential for the return trip. The replacement cost was $30. I don’t have that kind of money to pay for something that was initially free. Especially when those words could be on the form or communicated. Don’t throw any papers away people.

Now the fourth thing I am adding is a request from Monica and I know Selena will back her up. The women at the resort were not the friendliest. I can even go as far as to say that they were downright mean and rude. Once we checked in and looked at our rooms, we were less than impressed. The ladies went to the check-in desk to request other rooms. There was an up charge of $40 a night but the room would not be available until the next day. Ok, so they took forever getting the rooms ready the next day so the ladies requested their money back. Let’s just say after much arguing and going back and forth, they finally got it back on our way out of the door. The women at the check-in did not want to give them the money back. They used their ever fluctuating exchange rate and reduced the money down to like $15 dollars a day. Naw I’m going to need my full $40 a day back. That was a mess.

One more up. The men on the other hand were fabulous. They were attentive and had my mimosas ready. Lol. Anytime that we went on excursions, the men were sensitive to my limitations and helped in anyway that they could. Wait, I do want to give credit to the women who gave the water aerobics class. They were also awesome. The ladies tweaked the class to allow me to really enjoy myself.

My friends were not impressed with Cancun. Besides the sweltering heat which is not good for MS, I had a good time. I would go back. My excursions would be snorkeling and taking the tour where you drive your own boat. And of course I would change my money over to pesos. I still need my magnet. Lol. For those who travel, what are some of your tips? Are there any destinations that you would recommend? And what are some of the things that you learned through experiences? Leave a comment in the box. Now I thought I set it up to get an email when someone leaves a comment. Let’s just say I obviously don’t know what I’m doing. I will work to figure it out. But as soon as I see your comment, I will definitely reply. As always you can email me at elsims27@yahoo.com.