Author: elsims

As a female, I am always leery when I need any kind of work done. Whether it is something wrong with my car or in my house. It is always a challenge. An opportunity for someone to make me a victim. And the anxiety of once again being the victim.

My coworker and I have been talking about this recently. She had an issue with her tire having a slow leak. It’s cold here so at first we thought it just needed air due to the weather. But the tire needed air everyday. Now we know there is truly something wrong. A service center where she was able to get air offered free tire repair. Sounds fishy right? The decision was to take it to the dealership. For me, my car is only a little over 2 years old, so it benefits me to go to the dealership. Her car is a little older but we both thought that would be a good idea. Not so much. They were rude to her and lied when they said there was no one there to put air in her tire. Really?!? This is normal business hours and no one can put air in her tire. Assholes! The bad part is I suggested them because they are always so nice to me. Now who does she get to fix this tire?

I don’t know much about cars or anything that needs fixed in the house. I rely on the integrity of whomever I call or whatever service center I visit. Most times I asked for recommendations from others. And when that doesn’t work, I pick a name and pray for the best. I have had people in my house that have done good work and fixed the issue. I have had people who created another issue trying to fix the original one. I have taken my car to service centers and left with a good price on a job well done. I have went to service center where I got charged an excessive amount of money and the problem still existed. Only to have to take it somewhere else and then pay more money to get the problem fixed. As a woman without any real knowledge of these things, I am liable to get beat time and time again.

Now let’s look at this logically. If I need a service and the company does a good job and are reasonably priced, I am more likely to return when I need other services. Also, I am probably going to recommend them to other people. Through their honesty and integrity, they have now gotten a new customer and possible future customers. Women are pretty loyal customers. When we find someone who we like, we stick with them. We want to know that we are valued you as customers and as human beings in general. Just because most of us are not aware of issues that go on with our cars and our houses should not present an opportunity for us to be taken advantage of.

Now the flip side, telling me that it is an expensive service when really all they did was a $20 job, having me replace parts when they aren’t even bad and giving poor customer service. Not only am I not going to return but I am also going to spread the word. Why would I not inform others? I would not want anyone to receive the same treatment. And of course I am not the only person who feels this way. In this age of social media, I don’t know why people continue to try to beat and mistreat other people. Unhappy customers can rate your work on Yelp and other sites. People can tell their thousands of friends on Facebook. They can create funny memes and put it on Instagram. There are countless ways to let others know that you are an asshole when it comes to doing business. You would think that people would not want to be on the receiving end of that. Now I just said that women are loyal but we can also be vengeful. Don’t fuck with us. And I am not saying these things do not happen to me as well. It is just not as common.

It is a shame that a woman had to start a website where people can find reputable businesses to receive services without getting robbed. Now I’m cheap and I don’t need that much done to pay her to recommend people to me. It would seem more like a win-win if she provided the knowledge for free to the consumers and charge the businesses to advertise on her website. Just saying Angie. It would be awesome to have a few businesses ran by honest, hard-working people who want to deliver quality services that don’t break the bank. I am aware that there is some jobs that are truly expensive. A new roof, a new engine, total home makeover. But why I gotta pay you $200 to change my headlight? Huh? Unless you have to take my car apart from front to back, that is a ridiculous price. I’m paying you $200 for less than 10 minutes of work. That shit sound crazy.

I am honestly just tired of the abuse, shoddy work and unreal pricing. I know that y’all have horror stories as well. If you would like to share them please write a comment below. Or if there is a business that you would recommend to others, give them some credit in the comments. Please remember I am currently fasting Facebook for Lent so I will not be able to see any comments made on my page. I am going to be honest with y’all. I don’t miss Facebook at all. I am well on my way to becoming an old lady who doesn’t even know what Facebook is. Or a young millennial that thinks they are doing something by not being on social media like the rest of their peers. Lol.

A couple of weeks ago I was in the barbershop hanging with my fellas and we were discussing I don’t know what exactly. Not sure how we got on this topic. But I stated that I was not involving myself in any extracurricular activities because I was waiting for my Mr. Right. Everyone, which were all men, laughed at me. Even the little 18-year-old was laughing at me. To him, I should have said be quiet little boy you don’t know nothing. And then I thought maybe I used the wrong word. I know that women always say things like I am waiting for Mr. Right or Mr. Perfect. Or I am always dating the wrong guys or kissing the frogs that don’t turn into a prince. And though these are clichés to describe our predicament, they work. I thought about it the next day and I realized what I said was not inaccurate. I am waiting for my Mr. Right. What that means to me definitely does not mean the same thing for every woman or the majority of woman for that matter.

I believe that we all should know what we want in our significant other. What we can tolerate,…wait not tolerate. I don’t like that word when it comes to relationships. The qualities that they have that could sometimes be annoying to someone but it doesn’t annoy you about this person. We should also know the things that we can bring to a healthy, productive, protective and supportive relationship. It is essential that we participate in these kind of relationships to allow us to become our best selves. I may be assuming that just because that’s something I would want, others would also. Well I’m definitely going to assume it because it makes damn good sense. But for those of you who are not looking for that kind of relationship that is fine as well. There have been times in my life when I didn’t want a relationship. I wasn’t in a good place and there was nothing I could bring to the table. I will say this, if you have nothing to bring, don’t come. Figure yourself out, learn to love yourself. Live your best life, do what makes you happy and do no harm to others. Simple huh?

I just want to expand upon this a little bit. My Mr. Right is someone who is right for me. There’s no guideline to what he should have based on society’s view. I don’t need tall, dark and handsome. But I definitely would prefer tall and handsome. He doesn’t have to look like a fitness model because I sure in the hell don’t. He doesn’t have to wear name brand expensive clothes and shoes. But I would like for him to dress nice and be presentable. His qualities are based on what I need in my life right now and years to come. I have come to these by trial and error. By my life and circumstances changing due to things outside of my control. The things that I valued or looked for in men when I was younger was different but the most important ones are still there. That makes these qualities a necessity not a want.

Now I’m going to talk about Lisa Nichols, who I am obsessed with, again. In her book, Abundance Now, she told a story of a lady who had written in a journal the qualities, needs and desires of her ideal mate when she was single. At some point down the line, the lady became involved in a long distance relationship with a guy who she ended up pregnant by. At this point she was questioning the relationship and went back to look at all the things that she had written about her ideal mate. The gentleman that she had been dating and was her child’s father had the majority of these qualities of her Mr. Right. So I thought this would be a good idea. I wrote some things down that my mate would embody. I’m going to share just a couple minor ones with you and a few major ones. I probably shouldn’t share the minor ones because you will see how shallow I really am. Lol. And maybe I won’t get laughed at when I say I’m looking for my Mr. Right. Don’t get me wrong I had time to break it down but it wasn’t worth the argument. Those turds will say anything to get you riled up.

-believes in God (major)
-accepts me for exactly who I am right now and continues to accept me as I grow and change (major)
-has a great work ethic but is not a workaholic
-kind to me and others
-fun-loving, wants to do things that we both enjoy but willing to try new things
-attractive, regular build, not too skinny or too big, about 5’10 – 6’5 (minor, kinda)
–enjoys eating and taking me out on weekly dinner dates (minor, but not really. I can go bi-weekly)
-knows how to grill (minor)

Then of course there are the obvious ones such as loyal, honest, supportive, so on and so forth. I am still putting things on the list, it’s not set in stone. I haven’t taken anything off though. I am firm about what I need and flexible about what I want, but I am praying that a good number of my wants are realized. For all my single people, have you written down your expectations for a mate? If not, would writing it down be something to help you see what is invaluable in a mate? I’m pretty sure no one is going to comment on here being as no one ever does. Lol. But feel free to post a comment, send an email (elsims27@yahoo.com) or shoot me a text (419-213-9391). Please do not leave a comment on Facebook or Messenger because I won’t see it any time soon.