I Choose Me

“I Choose Me.” I heard this in an affirmation on the Sincerely Her podcast, Note 225 and it resonated with me. Then I seen it in an email from Keys Soulcare by Alicia Keys. I was like okay this is important. In Monday Mastermind, we talked about not losing the ground we have gained from being in a pandemic. When the world opens back up, how do we continue to keep ourselves and our goals a priority?

The answer is choosing you. The best way to choose yourself is to set boundaries and stick to them. I know it’s hard. Life pulls us in so many different directions. Kids, husband, parents, friends, work, school, unexpected events, planned events. So many damn things to do. It seems like we can’t get a moment for ourselves. Our goals. We have to put our foot down and make our declarations known. How can someone respect your boundaries if you don’t communicate what they are?

“Every time you’re given a choice between disappointing someone else and disappointing yourself, your duty is to disappoint that someone else. Your job throughout your entire life is to disappoint as many people as necessary in order to avoid disappointing yourself.” – Glennon Doyle, “Untamed”

I am going to disappoint a lot of people as I continue to grow and choose me. And I am okay with that. If they aren’t, that is their problem. Ladies, we have to stop compromising ourselves for the comfort of others. I know we are grateful to our parents for raising us and making sure we made it to adulthood, but we can’t live the lives they want us to live. We have to live the life that makes us happy. Ladies, I know you want to give your kids the world, but don’t forget you are a person with needs too. Give to yourself as well.

Who can you disappoint in order to not disappoint yourself? When are you going to set your boundaries? Who needs to know where the line is so they don’t cross it? Let’s make being well and whole a priority. It starts with choosing you. Much love 🧡💚

Thank You Sam 😃

I just want to give a ginormous THANK YOU to Samantha for sharing her thoughts, her diagnosis and her wisdom in representation of MS Awareness month. For shining her light so bright that all the world could see it. Like how cute and cool is she 😍. Of course she had things going on in her own life and still managed to provide us with 5 amazing posts. I cannot thank Sam enough. I needed her stories and her perception of life with MS. One day I will learn to listen to my body as Sam does. I commend her for not just knowing when to give her body a rest, but actually doing it.

I hope everyone was able to take bits and pieces from each of her posts and apply it to their life. I know one other thing I could apply to my life is being more understanding. Because listen when I tell you, if that man had yelled at me when I was struggling to walk to my car, he would have been on the receiving end of getting his ass cussed out. But sweet Sam said he could have been in a rush to get somewhere important. Word!

Sam, you even motivated me to start working out again. Seeing the role that exercise plays in her life and how it is helping her MS, made me realize I probably could move better if I was a little more active. Despite every hurdle that was thrown my way, I did some kind of workout this week. And though it has only been a week, I can honestly say I feel better. Now I may change my mind when the soreness kicks in 😆.

These past 2 weeks have been a blessing to me. I am looking forward to the other stories that people will share this month. I am excited for the inspiration and insights that I will receive from these very special people. Stay tuned and stay well and whole. Much love 🧡💚

P.S. Here is the YouTube link to my appearance on The Masterful Morning Show. I am discussing this here blog and MS Awareness.

Watch “MS Awareness Month with Ebony Sims – The Masterful Morning Show” on YouTube

Samantha Vanderman, Part 5

Since this is my final article, I wanted to say thank you – I hope you enjoyed reading the articles as much as I enjoyed writing them! And, thank you again to Ebony for giving me the chance to share my story. Oh, and if you want to connect you can find me on IG @slsalvaggio 🥰

The last MS story has to do with the power of perspective and having gratitude. 

I frequently refer to my MS journey as a rollercoaster ride I didn’t sign up for (but I wouldn’t change it either). The disease has taken my eyesight and the ability to be spontaneous, but it also puts a lot in perspective and reminds me to be grateful, everyday. 

The thing is, chronic disease or not, we all have good days and bad days. If you’re like me, on a bad day perspective goes out the window. Basically, I turn real negative, real quick. “Everything goes wrong. Nothing EVER works out. Of course I messed it up” play on repeat in my head.

Then, all of a sudden my thoughts will be interrupted by MS – part of my face will go numb or my arm will feel wet (but it’s not) or I will trip. And boom, my perspective instantly shifts from being negative to being grateful. Grateful that I can feel my face *most* of the time. Grateful that I have the option to take the stairs, even if I stumble. Etc. Etc. 

I realize quickly that in the whole scheme of things whatever I am being negative about doesn’t really matter. Having gratitude can shift your perspective with anything. Plus, there is ALWAYS something to be grateful for. You just have to find it. You may have to dig a little, but…it’s there.

What are you grateful for at this very moment?