Month: June 2020

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Lack of Communication

The unthinkable happened to me. I am out of town and my phone crapped out on me. One minute I was playing a game on my phone, the next my screen was flickering. Kinda like when a TV screen goes out. Well exactly like it. The difference is this is my phone with all of my shit on it. Literally, all of my shit. Even all of my passwords are saved in my phone. Websites, businesses and apps are requiring such complicated passwords that I can’t remember all of that. Then they make you change them and that never works out for me. So I don’t know any of them except for the one I use for my bank.

There is so many things wrong with this situation. Like I said, I am out of town. Two, I drove here. It is a 14 hour drive. That requires music and any other interesting thing to keep one entertained for such a long journey. Not missing the fact that I would need a mode of communication just in case I had any issues on the road. Verizon is running a deal with $300 off a Samsung Note 10 (yes I am Team Android) and I had thought about upgrading. But I love my phone and up until that point, it had been working fine. I have insurance on my phone and would have been able to get it fixed, yet all the information I needed is back at home…ugh! So I say forget it. I am just going to get this new phone. I visit Verizon’s website using my laptop and I am unpleasantly surprised. Whereas the other day when I viewed the deal and there were phones available, that is no longer a fact this day. They are all out of the phone that I want! And so are the local retailers where I am at.

Now I am like what the hell do I do!?!? Ok, ok, I can grab a prepaid phone from Target and use that as my mode of communication for my trip home, do what I need to get my phone fixed and I am good. Yes, plan made. As I am sure you’ve guessed by now, plan already failed. For one, why the hell are they charging all this money for prepaid phones, even a janky ass flip phone? Two, the cheapest one they had was on sale for $20 and they were out of them. I will be damned if I pay more than $20 for a damn phone that is wack ass hell and I will probably never use again. Being as it is a prepaid, I still have to load the damn thing up to even use it. I am trying to accept the fact that I may still have to go with this plan when I overhear my mom’s conversation. She is complaining about the one time she had to get a phone at Best Buy because Verizon did not have the phone she wanted in stock.

Yes, yes! How have I forgot about the fact that Best Buy sells phones? I guess because I haven’t been there in a while due to the pandemic. Like they never even crossed my mind. So, this story has a somewhat happy ending after all. Best Buy did have the phone I wanted available including the deal for the extra $300 off the phone. They even had the color I wanted. The downside, I can’t get it until Tuesday. The other upside, I don’t plan on leaving South Carolina until Thursday. That gives me enough time to get the phone set up for a successful trip back home.

The reason why it is not a completely happy ending is because a good portion of my shit is stuck on that phone. I was able to retrieve some things by hooking my phone to my laptop and saving it to my laptop. But the things I had not saved to my phone or SD card are lost. So now I am at a place where I need to figure out a safe way to save important information just in case this happens again. I used to keep all of my passwords and important information in a notebook, but we all know that is not safe either. That would require me carrying that notebook with me all the time, the possibility of it getting lost and someone having all my important information. I don’t want to save it in my laptop either because this damn thing could crap out as well and I won’t have access again.

Has this happened to you? What did you do to make sure that you would not be in this position again? Technology is great but when it fucks up, it is the worse. I have to formulate a plan. I am open to any tips. I don’t know about y’all but I have become too dependent on my devices. They are so convenient. I actually write majority of my blog posts on my phone because I always have it with me. When a thought strikes I can just go to my Evernote app and get to typing. It is easy to add pictures or videos since they are already on my phone. I even have the WordPress app that I can use to upload the posts. Really convenient. Not to mention the music. Amazon Music app loaded with my favorite jams. Comedy shows downloaded from Netflix to listen to when I am on long drives and bored. And countless other options available to us right in our hands.

If this has not ever happened to you, I hope it never does. Total pain in the ass. Lol. I just realized I never mentioned that I am unable to receive/send text or calls. I guess that isn’t as important. I know that America is back “open”, but Coronavirus cases are still climbing and racism continues to rear its ugly head. There is a lot going on. At the same time, so is our everyday lives. Just be careful. Be well and whole. Much love 🧡💚

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All Lives Can’t Matter Until Black Lives Matter

Warning **Explicit Language due to Anger**
Warning **Explicit Content**

Now if you are reading after those two warnings you are willing to hear and see what I have to share.

My mom and my niece attending a protest rally in South Carolina.

I have been filled with so much anger at the things I have been seeing online in regards to these protests. I am upset that in the beginning the media tried to shine a negative light on the protests. Reporting only on the riots and looting. Depicting all the protests as violent and destructive. They didn’t start really reporting the truth until social media took over the narrative. Videos of people in attendance at these events brought a different perspective that could not be ignored any longer. These videos showed the police using their authority to commit unlawful acts against innocent citizens. If you haven’t seen them yet, here is a few links. These videos I am sharing are from various people I follow on Instagram. I do not own the rights to any of these videos. Like I stated above, Explicit Content. I recommend only watching these videos if you are able to handle what you see.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CA6-mXcncql/?igshid=gbez87dccrm2

https://www.instagram.com/p/CA6TCIGnuWm/?igshid=1ndr9tl4t3g7j

Ok last one because my stomach is turning and honestly I can’t handle it myself.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CAzE7TdHUgC/?igshid=ilmz87ueylx1

I mean they pushed down a 75 year old man and left him for dead. Thank God he has been reported as doing okay but really!?!?!?!?!

The reality is how much do they, whoever the hell they are, expect people to take? At first I was totally against the destruction. Then as I received more and more information, I gained a better understanding. Then I put myself in someone else’s shoes. If my nephew, 16 years old and all of 6 feet tall, who would be considered a “threat” due to height alone was on the receiving end of any police brutality/murder, I would burn this country to the ground. I would not stop until justice was muted out in a court of law or by my own hands. This may sound out of place but do it. Put yourself in any of these parents, brothers, sisters, sons or daughters shoes. If any of these unarmed, unnecessary deaths was one of your family members, how would you respond?

I realize that these protest won’t change the most racist of hearts. It is to reach the people who have been neutral or unconcerned because it didn’t effect them. It is like when we see wars breaking out in other countries, buildings being bombed and citizens dying and we are upset and frustrated. But we know that there is only so much we can do. The thing is the murders of unarmed black men and women are happening right here in our own country and there is something we can do. We can stop watching the TV with anger and frustration and get out here and work on changing this country. That means educating yourself and not taking what you see in mainstream media as fact.

I didn’t really cuss and that is so unusual. Lol. I am angry but explicit language isn’t always necessary to get your point across. However, it does usually make me feel better. Maybe if I had posted this last week every other sentence would have been laced with profanity. I have had a moment to calm down a little. I am still in this fight against racism. I don’t want any of these protest to die a slow death. We need change and it is long overdue. I believe this country will not rest in peace any longer. And I am stretching it by calling all these years of quiet acceptance of the mistreatment of black people peace. It was actually an underground volcano waiting to erupt. Now everyone is getting hit with the shit.

Here is a few clips of protest rallies around the world including America. They inspire me and fill my heart. It is crazy that other countries are so in support of black people here in America.


I sent this to my mom and said it looks like the whole country showed up. Lol

https://www.instagram.com/p/CBHI9GUnZl9/?igshid=1hgvqcnrbr0qy

https://www.instagram.com/p/CBHImwZHM59/?igshid=1uhm7mzbtews3

https://www.instagram.com/p/CBHIHcwHS3f/?igshid=1ii9k4ixmlojh

https://www.instagram.com/p/CBLMQhNH6Oq/?igshid=hr3isksjj9wb

And it was so many more with huge turnouts. Even the Amish supported Black Lives Matter.

I am currently listening to an audiobook by Ijeoma Oluo called “So You Want To Talk About Race.” It can be a tough read if you aren’t black but it is a very informative book. I recommend it. When she talked about the first time she was called the n word, that was tough for me. It broke my heart. No one is asking white people to go through what we go through, we are just asking for white people to be aware of it. I watched this clip of a video from Jane Elliot asking a room full of white people a very specific question. Jane Elliot is a teacher/anti-racism advocate that did an exercise on her students back in 1968 called Blue Eyes – Brown Eyes. The students in the class were treated differently based on eye color. It was to demonstrate how blacks are treated versus whites. Let’s say the exercise did not go over well. No one wants to be treated like black people. Hear is the clip.

This video is kind of old so I guess some white people were already aware. And now that people are really aware, due to watching a man die right before their eyes on a video, what is going to change? I don’t know. I just hope and pray that laws are changed, new laws are made and that racists are taken out of positions of power. I know that black people will never fully be accepted in America or the world. There will always be someone who is racist towards blacks. But I believe that the more anti-racist individuals and black people unite in this world, the better it will be.

I don’t know what my future posts will be like. I know I still want to continue to share books, ideas, wins/losses and everything in between with you all. I am just caught up in my feelings right now. I hope each and every one of you continue to be well and whole. Find some peace in all this craziness. Stay safe. Much love 🧡💚