Month: May 2020

So I had written almost a whole post that I was going to share but then I logged onto Instagram. The first post I seen on Instagram was this.

As I scrolled down further I seen that there was also a video of this black man being killed by a white police officer. Anything I was talking about on my blog was nowhere near as important as this. My heart shattered. I felt his pain and anger from the above post. Here we are again. Actually this is a situation that we never left. I don’t know how to process this. Like what corner do I stuff this in yet again? I mean what the fuck!?!?!?!?!

The coronavirus is out here claiming lives left and right and police officers are too. The fact that they keep getting by with it is emboldening them to continue to take the lives of black men and women without any reason. Fear? You scared but you are the one with the weapon. They raided the wrong house and killed a black woman, Breonna Taylor, who is a first responder/essential worker while she slept and that’s ok because they felt threatened. They pressed their knee into a man’s neck, George Floyd, until he is dead and he is laying on the ground handcuffed and unarmed. It is to the point that civilians are killing people, Ahmaud Arbery, jogging through the neighborhood because he matched the description of someone breaking into houses.

And the worst part about that is if the video had not surfaced, they would have gotten away with killing that young man. When will it end? When will the boys in blue be held accountable for their racist acts? And people can say this is not about race but we know that is bullshit. I have seen plenty of episodes of cop shows where white people are cussing the cops out, brandishing weapons and running from police in high speed chases and walking away unharmed. No tasing, no gunshots and alive to return home to their families.

So I need to give these lives a moment of silence. I need to heal. I don’t know how to compartmentalize this anymore. Everyone stay safe and continue to be well and whole. Still much love 🧡💚.

Today would have been the Multiple Sclerosis walk in Toledo, Ohio. Unfortunately, since the coronavirus is taking over the world, the walk was cancelled. It was cancelled pretty early on once a pandemic was declared. Majority of MS medications are immunosuppressive which makes people with MS more susceptible to catching the Rona. Imagine a walk full of immune suppressed people all catching the virus. Terrifying 😱.

I was really excited at the beginning of the year about the MS walk and had purchased my yarn back in February. This year I was going to make 2 full size blankets and 1 lap blanket for someone who uses a scooter or wheelchair. My mom decided she would make the lap blanket. I started in March and made real progress. My goals was to have both blankets completed 2 weeks before the walk. After the actual walk was cancelled I lost all kinds of motivation.

Who the hell was I going to give the blankets to anyway? I don’t really know a lot of people with MS. Normally I would just go to the walk and whomever God lead me to, I would bless with a blanket. Worked out pretty well. Now what?

Despite this unexpected outcome I still felt the need to finish the blankets. Well, once I put them together, they turned out to be a little smaller than expected. More like lap blankets. Smh. I don’t remember the schematics for the larger blanket. I will write down the measurements for the lap blankets and just know I need to double it to get the bigger blankets. They still look pretty good though.

Finished the green one last night before I went to bed 😅. Not the two weeks before but still done and checked off my yearly goals. Yay! Oddly, I am still managing to check some things off. I will continue to do as many as I can before the end of this year. Are any of you still working on the goals you set for yourself? How is it going? And if not, why? I would love to hear from you.

One more goal accomplished I forgot to tell you all about.

Yep my long awaited, highly anticipated GoPro Hero 8. I am still excited about this baby right here. Just wish I had some adventures to record. The day will come and I will definitely share all my fabulous adventures with you all.

If you know of anyone with Multiple Sclerosis that would benefit from one of these blankets let me know. Like I said I have no one to give them to at this point. My goal is always to make someone feel special and understood. Especially being someone also affected by this disease. Feel free to leave a comment below or send me an email at elsims27@yahoo.com. As we continue to live through this pandemic with caution and hopefully hope, be well and whole. Much love 🧡💚!

God is testing me. This is nothing new. We all have tests we pass, tests we fail but still learn the proper way to pass or tests we fail miserably. I don’t know what my percentage is on the tests I passed or the ones I failed, but if I had to guess I am sure I would be in between the fail but still learn and fail miserably levels.

I was presented with an indefinite amount of time off work due to my health condition and the coronavirus possibly forming a toxic relationship. When it happened I was like, “If I am off too long I may not want to come back.” I haven’t went a significant amount of time off work in over 10 years. Like what in the hell would I do with myself? Then it hit me, God wants to know if I mean what I say.

“God I just need some time to relax.” “Maybe if I had some real time off, I can clear my mind out and start to really figure out what I want to do.” “I could write more if I just had the time.” And so on and so on. All the excuses I put out there to justify my inactivity. Some of them may be legitimate but most are just bullshit.

I joined a book club. I just realized this isn’t my first book club. I said it was but I totally forgot about one that I was a part of about 3 years ago. That book club was good but a little inconsistent and eventually disbanded.

This new book club is called the Rich Lit Society. It is hosted by none other than my future husband Sean Croxton. Lol. He has so many great, motivational projects out here. Anyways, we are assigned a book to read with specific pages to be covered on our Wednesday weekly Zoom meeting. The calls usually last about an hour and a half. There is also questions provide by Sean to get us thinking about the material. These questions helps us to dig a little deeper. This month’s book is called “The Alchemist” by Paulo Coelho. I am struggling to stay within the pages assigned each week. I just want to devour the whole book. Lol. I will not go into detail about the book in this post. It deserves a post of its own. I will say I hope that it helps me along in this journey of discovery.

I have an opportunity that I did not see myself being presented with any time soon. It’s here people! I am excited and terrified at the same time. I am scared that I won’t find my place and I will spend this time spinning in circles. I feel like I have done just that my whole life. But the possibilities of what will happen are endless and makes my heart race. It makes me think of this quote.

Now all the obstacles have been removed. God asked, “What are you going to do?” If I don’t take this time and utilize it to the best of my ability, I don’t know what will happen. What I do know is if I do not accomplish something, I have been lying all this time. And I don’t like lying. Not to myself or others. So here goes!

As more and more businesses open up, I just want each and every one of you to be cautious and stay safe. And also continue to be well and whole. Much love 🧡💚