Forewarned

I find myself thinking and overthinking when it comes to posting on my blog. Sometimes I know what I want to say but I don’t have the words to say it. Other times, I know what I want to say but the way that I want to say it may rub some people the wrong way. The latter bothers me the most. Reason being, when I decided to write this blog I said that I wanted to be me. Me as in, I want to say things that the younger, feistier me would. I don’t want to think and rethink what I have to say, my comments, opinions or my thoughts. I just want to say it.

Since I have set a goal to reach more people by advertising my blog on Facebook and LinkedIn, I decided now is the time to post this. I still have not figured out who is my target audience. Probably something I should have done before I started a blog. I hesitate with handing out my business cards because I’m not sure who would be interested in my blog. I don’t want just women to read it but I’m not sure if men will feel it is value added to their life. Even though, I feel anyone can relate to some of the things that I write. I definitely don’t want anyone under the age of 18 peeking on my blog, even if they can relate.

One thing that I’ve noticed lately is that people are too damn sensitive. Any time someone says something, somebody has to get offended. Now for me personally most things don’t offend me because I realize that person isn’t talking to me. If you know who you are, what your limitations are and you are happy with yourself what people say should not offend you. For example, I was reading an Instagram post by a girl who works for the WWE Wrestling Federation or whatever. To paraphrase her, she said everybody can be healthy, work out and do what is necessary to get the type of body that they would like. Now I know that I’m limited so in no way, shape or form did what she say offend me. Why you ask? Because she wasn’t fucking talking to me. So for the person that commented on there saying that everybody cannot do that because of physical limitations, why the hell are you offended? She wasn’t talking to you. Take a chill pill as they used to say back in the day and calm the fuck down.

So to add to this and part of my point is, I’m probably going to say things that offend you. First off, the one thing that may offend someone is my use of cuss words. I cuss a lot. Most people don’t know that. But if you really know me, you know that. I don’t plan on being overly offensive with cuss words on purpose but I know that in this blog I will use cuss words. That may be to say this is not for you. And I understand that. What I would not understand is someone leaving comments reprimanding me for cussing. If you don’t like it just don’t read it. There may be countless other ways and other things I do that may be offensive. I’m not doing it on purpose or to be mean, but what I am doing is being me. And I love me. I’m comfortable with me at this point in my life. That’s why I decided to do this blog right now. So if I do offend you, know that it was in no way on purpose or in a mean way. I’m just stating my opinion on a topic. If you decide to no longer read my blog, I understand.

I of course want to grow my audience and have people commenting on my posts. I always want to touch people. If you do realize that my blog isn’t for you, share my site with someone that it may be for. I am not everybody’s cup of tea but I’m somebody’s. As always, feel free to leave a comment. I will respond. Or you can email me at elsims27@yahoo.com.

Social Media aka Time Waster

I have a love/hate relationship with social media. I don’t like taking pictures so let’s say I “hate” Instagram and Snapchat because that is the main aspect of their apps. I “love” Instagram because I like the funny memes and videos and Pam the bulldog. If you don’t know who Pam is, look her up on Instagram. One of the most awesome dogs in the world. I have Instagram but I have never posted anything on my account. No Snapchat period. No to Twitter as well. For one, I don’t think that you can limit this motormouth to just 140 characters. Hell, I started a blog to be able to talk endlessly. Two, would not ever join now that the current president is making a mockery out of the site. He is uncool so it makes Twitter seem uncool now. I have a LinkedIn account that doesn’t even have a picture of me.

Now to Facebook. Okay, this relationship is complicated. I have family and friends on Facebook that do not live near me. Facebook affords me the opportunity to see pictures and know what’s going on in their lives without me having to talk to them. I love and care about them but at the same time, I’m anti-social. As is most people, so don’t judged me. Lol. I like to watch videos and read uplifting, touching stories. Facebook allows me to do this all in one place without having to comb the internet. And with all the permissions you allow them just to have an account, they know what you like and give you suggestions of videos to watch. Win/lose situation. Also, this is where I see most of my news and current events. This makes me what to learn and do my own research about what is really going on.

Now to the hate. Facebook also is a place to display pics which I hate so, strike one. People put too much of their business on Facebook and get mad when others say something negative. Really?!?, strike two. Once you actually post something, you have to be available to respond if anyone makes a comment. Even though I am anti-social, I’m not mean. Ok maybe just a little. But I don’t want to ignore people’s comments, so I have to keep checking and respond in a timely manner. Yes, I know I can get notifications when people make a comment and that would reduce the checking. Except I hate receiving notifications all day, strike three. Since we struck out, here is a couple of balls. Once you comment on someone’s post, every time someone else does you have the privilege of knowing, ball one. People know when you are on Facebook and want to have side conversations with you. Noooooo, I just want to watch my videos and read my stories. Or play games. I don’t want to talk, ball two. Sherry, I don’t ever mind your side conversations though. Messenger, totally unnecessary. Yet I have not been able to bring myself to delete it. This is how I send my mom the funny or touching stories and videos.

Social media as a whole is a time waster. We spend countless hours watching videos, reading other people’s business or posting our own business. We spend time taking picture after picture just to get the right one as our profile pic. Don’t act like it’s just me. We waste so much time without even realizing it. Sometimes I just think of the other things I could be doing or could have done. Then I think about losing the flimsy connection that I have with my friends and family. What is a girl to do?

I do believe that social media has its place. For people with their own business it is a great way to advertise. Inform people of events, sales and new projects. As artist, you can display your work. Singers can go live and give people a concert which can help sell albums. And it’s basically free. Now that is a win/win. Also, with sites like LinkedIn, you can network and gain new business connections. You can post your resume and get scouted for jobs or look for jobs yourself. Some people have started businesses or their own brand using social media. Funny videos, which I watch, have made people famous and given them opportunities to display their talents on a larger scale. It does have it’s purpose.

I guess I am going to have to parent myself. Parents put restrictions on kids as far as playing with gaming systems and watching tv. I need to put restrictions on myself about visiting social media sites. Maybe something like 30 minutes to one hour a day. I’m going to give this a try starting Monday. I am not sure which site I waste more time on, but I am going to delete Instagram. I’ll miss Pam, but I don’t post anything and I use it solely as a time waster. Facebook, I won’t delete, but I will pull the plug on Messenger. And now that I am posting regularly, finally, I’ll use Facebook and LinkedIn as sites to advertise my blog. Once I stop wasting time maybe I can actually post more and by sharing on social media, I can really grow my audience. Now that is a win/win!

How do you feel about social media? Would you give it up? What would you do with all the free time? Please share your comments in the box or email me at elsims27@yahoo.com. If this is the first post you have read, to make a comment, click on the title and it will be a box at the end of my post.

MS-cellaneous

I have a hard time talking about Multiple Sclerosis (MS as I will refer to it the rest of this post) because I do not want to do the disease a disservice. I truly believe that it is a serious disease but I try not to approach it in that way. I live my life in humor and reality. My friends and I can joke about it and I not feel offended. I know the disease and it’s progression. I know that it is an autoimmune disease that eats away the protective covering on your nerves. I know that after an episode/exacerbation, you may not regain the complete use of whatever area was affected. I know that there is no cure but a lot of medications with horrible side effects. I know that there is so much more that I will not put in this post. But most importantly I know that I have MS.

I know people say that you shouldn’t claim an illness or disease. So I’ll say, I have signs and symptoms of a person who has MS. These past weeks I have had signs and symptoms of a person who is/has had an MS exacerbation. I even participated in a treatment recommended for someone who is having an exacerbation. I really didn’t want the treatment but I realized that I wasn’t going to get better without it. This time was different though. I went to the hospital 3 days in a roll to receive steroid medication intravenously. By the third day I felt better as usual. The day after still doing good. The second day after, which was a Sunday, I couldn’t get myself to move. I had severe brain fog and my body wouldn’t cooperate. I was laid low. This had never happened to me before after a treatment. I rested all day and was so thankful that the next day was a holiday. If I had to work, I would have called off. I DO NOT call off work. By Monday, a little less brain fog and some mobility gained. Tuesday back to work. I made it through the day. Thank God it was my short day.

Now here I am a week later, feeling better still but not who I was before the episode. Walking more like a person than a penguin. Can walk without the use of my stick. Also have the ability to do my job without questioning every little thing I do. Thankful, blessed. I am thankful for everyone that prayed for my recovery and healing. Thankful for the concern from my friends, family and coworkers. Thankful for those who came through for me when I needed them. Blessed that my doctor and his nurses responded quickly to get me in treatment. Blessed to be able to go back to work. Blessed to continue to live an independent life. I don’t take it for granted.

There are many things that I have learned since I have had the signs and symptoms of MS. I’m only going to touch on a couple. I have learned insecurity. I have always been a pretty confident person (thanks Mom). This disease with its limitations, will suck the confidence right out of you. I am not an aggressive woman but if I see someone interesting, I would approach him. Yea….not so much now. Now when someone approaches me, I am even reluctant to talk to them. They see a happy and what looks like a healthy young lady. I know that I am damaged goods. So when do you tell them? At that time or later on when you thinks he likes you enough to still call? I also learned an urgency to live now. My signs and symptoms point to the possibility of a wheelchair in my future. Yes you can still live in a wheelchair, I realize that. But there are activities that would be challenging or impossible to do in one. I want to do all of them now. I want to make memories. Have stories. I don’t want to think I missed out on anything. That is one of my greatest fears.

I truly skimmed over the top of MS. I honestly don’t like talking about it at all. The only reason I did was due to the recent episode. It was such a new and humbling experience for me. It requires acknowledgement. Up until this point I have had an easy journey with MS. I can still walk, work, even dance a little. I have never been hospitalized. Never required someone to wipe my ass. Never used more than a walking stick. Never missed a day of work due to MS. Have always been able to transport myself. Except for a few things, lived a pretty normal life. This episode showed me the true face of MS. Showed me that I may be just one episode away from all the things that I fear the most.

I don’t want to discourage anyone from asking me about MS or my journey. MS, though not talked about as many other diseases, is on the rise. Still I didn’t know exactly what it was until I was diagnosed. So please feel free to ask any questions. And I even encourage you to put them in the comments section because it may be the same one someone else has. Or you can always email me at elsims27@yahoo.com.